When it comes to infertility, there is often no right thing to say. When I actually bring up the subject with someone be it a family member or friend I have not found one person who can relate to what I am going through. I have yet to find someone who has had multiple miscarriages and failed IVF. The closest I’ve come is a friend who needed some Clomid, the one who only needed Metformin, the one who lost weight, one who had an early miscarriage then has not stopped getting pregnant, and a friend who had a few IUI‘s to get pregnant. I am not trivializing what any of them went through, but why am I the only one to go through so much and have nothing good at the end?
I don’t want anyone else to go through what I am going through, but with every month it becomes less likely that I will ever have a child. When I have no one left to talk to, because everyone has moved on, relieved that they didn’t go through what I am going through, why do I bother? I don’t know that this will work. It may never work. Sure I may keep getting pregnant, which is more than many women so I should be grateful for that, but each loss hurts more and more.
If the women I know who have personally gone through infertility cannot relate you can imagine how much worse it is with family members who have had children easily.
One of the worst things is that when one of the above mentioned friends tells me it’s not so bad, I will have a child one day, it’s like they have forgotten what they went through. The truth is, even though they suffer from infertility in some way or another none of them even come close to what I have gone through. If you combined all of what they went through it doesn’t add up to everything I’ve been through in just the last year. There is no one I can talk to who understands.